


i fell in love with the insanity in you

by yeon_shii



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Duality, Eventual Smut, Hurt, Jealousy, Jihoon's POV, M/M, Psychological, Romance, Violence, caretaker jihoon, euigeon vs daniel, mentally ill daniel, nielwink, winkniel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2019-01-19
Packaged: 2019-04-18 18:52:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14219538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeon_shii/pseuds/yeon_shii
Summary: He didn't expect to let his guard down and get attached to one of their patients.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this was supposed to be a one-shot but it's too long so I cut it down into chapters  
> a trashfic that i think should be at least posted bcs i worked hard on this somehow.  
> please don't mind the summary and the title, i have no idea for those.  
> (!! warning for the incoming errors! i'm procrastinating my proof reading i'm sorry)

"Who did this?" The look on his eyes was burning with rage. I shivered under him as he cornered me on the wall as soon as I got home, examining my face with cuts and bruises tattooed on my skin. His gaze scared me, I'm so scared I could feel my legs weaken.

 

I'm scared to tell him.

 

I don't want it to happen again.

 

Suddenly, I feel something wet tracing down my face and the sudden change of his face made me realize that I was crying. He retrieved his hand on the wall and started to cup my face instead. His eyes changed to something filled with concern and affection– I internally sighed and calmed down. The warmth of his hand made me feel so safe and loved. The pain and fear I was feeling was long forgotten.

 

"I'm sorry for startling you baby, I didn't mean it– I'm so sorry please don't cry." He whispers and wraps his arms around me.

 

I love him the most when he's like this. I love it when his touch sends sparks to my nerves- how his warm embrace makes me feel light as a feather. His hands traveled to my brown locks and started to thread his fingers with it. I feel so relaxed with just him beside me and being affectionate like this.

 

With the sudden change of gravity, my eyes went wide as he carried me with his one hand on my back and one hand on my bottom. I hid my reddening face and I could hear him chuckle. He carried me upstairs and I could smell the scent of mint and deodorant combined- oh I love that smell so much. The smell of _home._

 

I was carried to the large bathroom and he placed me carefully on the counter. I had my head down but I can hear him getting something from the cabinets– of course, a first aid kit. I yelped as he started to treat my wounds. I had several cuts, not only my face but my arms as well. As for the bruises, he glazes some ointment on top and I love how his fingers graced along my skin. I shivered and I felt giddy inside.

 

Thinking that he's finished, I was about to open my mouth and thank him but a wet muscle on the corner of my lips caught me off guard. My face flushed a bright shade of red as he licks the blood off my lips. My heart started to beat rapidly, literally taking my breath away.

 

"Jihoonie, I just wish you would just tell me why you often have lots of wounds and bruises every time you get home." He whispered.

 

"You would get mad," I whispered back at him. He threw me a confused look and I looked away- not wanting to feel the urge to tear up in front of him.

 

"Why would I?"

 

"Just because.."

 

"Stop being so secretive, you know I care about you." His words made me face him and at that moment our eyes were locked. He was genuine about his words and I could see the sincerity in his deep brown eyes, those eyes that makes me feel so lost in them. Even though he had said that countless of times it still have that kind of effect on me.

 

It was half to midnight and it was so quiet I could only hear our heavy breaths. Our eyes remained locked as if we were communicating through them. No words were exchanged, just the look in our eyes that screamed with wants. I gulped, feeling submissive under him. He inched closer and I knew what was going happen.

 

"Euigeon, I–" I tried to avoid him but he forced himself on me.

 

He nibbled on my bottom lip and I could feel the cut on my lip sting as he was sucking it. I could taste a bit of blood and I moan in return. It gave him more confidence so he started to deepen the kiss. It was slow but hard.

 

I placed my hands on Euigeon's shoulder to keep my balance. His wet muscle intruded into my cavern and I yelp in surprise. He placed one of his hand on the back of my head and pulled me closer to himself. Giving up, I let my tongue meet his. Rubbing our tongues sensationally sends heat throughout my body, and maybe his too. Euigeon is such a great kisser, he never fails to make me tremble and submit easily. His kisses were full of love and affection.

 

I missed Euigeon so much.

 

" _Ah-_  Euigeon, _hah.._ let me– let me breathe." I pushed him gently, catching my breath. I was sweating and I'm afraid my face was going to explode any minute..

 

Glancing at Euigeon, his ears were as red as my face, his hair is messed up and sticking out everywhere, his eyes were dark and full of desire. He was also panting and I could see his chest heaving up and down. My heart skipped a beat when I realized his second button was unbuttoned, exposing his chest and his cross necklace seen dangling.

 

He licked his lips, slowly moving to me again.

 

"You look really.. really cute right now."

 

I slapped him playfully. I'm so embarrassed when he says things like that. I like- love it whenever he compliments me but I can't help but feel like hiding from him. His words has the power to trigger something inside me somehow and I hate it. How could he be so smooth at everything?

 

"Stick your tongue out."

 

"Excuse me?"

 

"Come on, baby." he pouted and pleaded, making me unable to resist him. Ahh really, this guy is really getting fishy.

 

Poking my tongue out hesitantly makes me feel so nervous yet giddy about what he was about to do. He smiled as I complied to his wish and he pulled himself closer to me. He parted his lips and closed them between my tongue. He bites my tongue gently, causing me to wince in surprise. He began to rub his tongue on the spots he bit and sucks it from time to time.

 

The sound of saliva and sucking echoed in the bathroom- making the tension even more erotic. My hands found its way to Euigeon's hair, not resisting the need to tangle my fingers with his blonde locks. Suddenly, I could feel a warm hand sneaking its way under my shirt. My body was boiling and his touch burned me even more. As his hands started to roam even further I felt alarmed and forced his hand out of my shirt.

 

"No," I warned him. "Stop th–"

 

He shuts me up with his mouth. He grabbed my thighs and carried me away from the counter. I wrapped my arms and legs securely around him as he leads me to our bedroom with lips never leaving each other.

 

The kiss was getting fast and rough, my body was dropped on the soft mattress of our bed. He hovered above me not breaking the kiss. His pace was so fast I couldn't keep up with him-resulting to a sloppy and messy kiss. I was running out of breath and I had to inhale from time to time. Euigeon never seems to get enough of the kiss but I didn't mind, it's just that he keeps stepping on his limitations.

 

"Euigeon!" I pulled away from him when I felt his hands feeling my thighs and moving somewhere I forbid him.

 

"Why are you resisting me?" He growled and pinned my arms down.

 

My eyes grew wide and his grip was so tight I could feel my bones breaking. The look in his eyes changed into something I feared the most.

 

_No._

 

This is not Euigeon anymore.

 

I started to tear up and it was a mistake. He pulled my collar and pushed me back on the bed in anger with force.

 

"D– Daniel," I tried to choke out. "I'm s– sorry."

 

"You unworthy brat," he hissed towards me. "What happened to the Park Jihoon who whines sluttily for attention?" He wrapped his fingers around, feeling his nails stabbing the skin on my neck. His fingers tightens every second, choking me half to death.

 

I tried to get his hands off me but I was getting weak and my vision started to get blurry. His face was still as sadistic as I can picture out. My fingers loosened around his hands- giving up, thinking that this would be the end of me.

 

"You're lucky you're cute."

 

He threw me on the side of the bed, leaving me to cough and breathe violently. I let my fingers caress my neck, confident that there are new marks formed and Euigeon would ask me what happened to my neck. With my head hung low I convinced myself not to cry, it would make him even more mad. Daniel would be mad. He would hurt me again.

 

But then, I love him, even though he's like that.

 

I still love him because he's a part of Euigeon.

 

"Come here," Daniel huffed and eyed me dangerously.

 

I crawled slowly and obediently and bowed my head down, not wanting to meet his deadly gaze. A touch made me flinch, his fingers traced my face and arms, specifically on the damages he made. I tried my best to hold myself from leaning into the touch, afraid that he might get mad at me again. It was so hard not to, especially when affection is what I needed the most right now.

 

"Are you afraid of me?" He whispered, stopping his index finger on my bottom lip, suddenly giving it a peck after a few seconds. I blushed at his actions. "Do you like me more than Euigeon now?"

 

 _No._ Was what I wanted to say.

 

My breathing hitched when he threaded his fingers on my hair. I was trying so hard not to respond his touch, It was so hard not to close my eyes and give in. His fingers knew what it was doing to me and I hated it. He was smiling, and he looked so beautiful smiling even though it's nowhere near genuine. I want to see Daniel smile genuinely again for once, I still want to hold on into the hope of him finally accepting me. But..

 

"Well?"

 

"I- I.." I couldn't muster up words without making him angry. So I just blurted out what I think was right. I built enough courage to look into his cautious eyes and open my quivering lips. "I love you both– but Euigeon.. is something __more__."

__

_Slap._

 

It’s not like I didn’t expect this to happen anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

On the first week of July it was the start of my internship. I didn't get to finish college but I managed to get hired as an assistant in a certain hospital even though I was merely a 16 year-old boy. I was really grateful to them, I needed something to do for a living since I have no one supporting me after my parents left me behind.

 

Long story short, they don’t need me.

 

It was quite scary working in the hospital knowing that I was going to meet people with mental disorders– illness. Who knows maybe one day someone might jump on me and kill me for no reason. But this was better than living life in the streets and sharing food with stray animals. It was better than sleeping alone in the dark with no sign of warm and comfort.

 

I really looked up to the hospital, I made sure to apply at any possible jobs for me and the hospital accepting me unlike the other industries is such a big relief. They gave me some hope in life even though this was not the kind of job I have expected. I promised to myself when I have successfully earned a lot of money I’ll leave the place, buy a house, finish college and find my dream job.

 

In the hospital, I was an assistant of Dr. Kim, one of the doctors with a higher position. He was so kind and made sure I was doing my job properly. I was assigned to jot down important notes and filling up the patient book. I would always be at his side whenever he talks to his patients.

 

And then at the age of 17 I met this person I didn't know I would dearly hold on to.

 

 

 

I first saw him at the lobby early in the morning. I was about to go to my office that time and his presence had taken me by surprise. He was staring at the ground, wearing a suit, his tie was loosened around his neck. I never seen him inside the hospital, I never seen him around. He didn’t seem to notice me even though I literally stopped on my track to at least get his attention without scaring him.

 

But it seems that I was the one getting scared instead during that time. He gives off this vibe that he shouldn’t be messed with. He has that dark vibe, low atmosphere. He was too quiet, too steady for my liking. He doesn’t seem like he’s sleeping, I’m pretty sure he’s awake. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I wasn’t expecting something else rather than a blank face.

 

I didn’t want to bother him with my presence anymore so I resumed my steps and walked towards the office with an eerie feeling circling around my chest.

 

Dr. Kim had a new patient and I hurried to go with him, making sure I have the papers with me. Entering the white room there we saw the new patient sitting on a chair. He had his hands cuffed and his head low. I kept looking at him, wondering what his case was.

 

A rush of the flashback earlier in the morning caught me off guard. His build was familiar and he was in the same position as he was earlier, the only difference is that he wasn’t wearing a suit anymore, just plain white clothes. It was indeed the man at the lobby.

 

Then suddenly he raised his head, making our eyes meet. My breath hitched and I was flustered because he was indeed so handsome. The nurses a few hours ago were whispering about how unfortunate it was for a handsome guy to be cursed with a mental disorder. I think so too.

 

He has a dirty blonde hair, monolid eyes, a broad shoulder, and a mole under his eyes. He was so flawless, adding on his milky white skin. We never had a patient this handsome before.

 

"Euigeon, 18 years old, what seems to be the problem?" Dr. Kim asked him, eyes traveling to his hands. "Did you ask them to cuff you?"

 

Euigeon nodded, "Daniel might get angry knowing that I went here."

 

_Wait, don't tell me.._

 

"Who is Daniel? Where is he?" Dr. Kim continued to ask him.

 

"He's a part of me."

 

 

 

 

 

_knock. knock._

 

Cautiously walking in, my fingers slightly trembled around the food cart. The nurse in charge was too terrified of him when she went to give him his dinner. I don't know what has gone into me that I bravely volunteered myself. Mr. Kim said it was okay and it's a good idea so that me and Euigeon would be _'fond'_ of each other.

 

As I push the cart, Euigeon looked up and smiled at me. I shivered with an unknown reason. But I smiled back and greeted him a good morning.

 

"That looks really delicious." He commented, his eyes scanning every inch of the food. He must be really hungry right now. Then suddenly an innocent question was asked, "Would you feed me?"

 

_What?_

 

"You don't want to free Daniel, right?,"

 

Not knowing what to say I quickly bobbed my head because heck, I wasn't expecting that.

 

And so I fed Euigeon. It took a lot of courage for me to pick up the spoon and carefully place it inside his mouth. But as I fed him, I could see a little smile forming in his lips. He laughed at me, he laughed at me for staring at him that the soup on the spoon fell to the floor. He was the first patient who gave off a carefree kind of laugh, his face scrunches, giving him an angelic kind of face. It was kind of adorable in my eyes. I didn't know why the nurse was so terrified since Euigeon was shockingly sweet, innocent and pure. Even though he's tied up he laughs at the most little things. He started to tease me and so I teased him back. We were literally acting like the best of friends as if we have known each other for so long when in fact we only met 24hours ago.

 

But still, I like seeing him happy. His laughs were so beautiful, it was like music to my ears. His smiles are so youthful especially when his adorable bunny teeth comes out. His eyes disappears and crinkles whenever he smiles or laughs. All these brightness made me question again that why is he here in the first place.

 

"Euigeon, can I ask you something?" I wiped the mess on the corner of his lips. He hummed in response. "What.. is Daniel like?"

 

I looked at him and his expressions changed. He wasn't smiling anymore, just– blank. I'm afraid I might have asked in a wrong time. But nevertheless, he answered, making me surprised. "Daniel.. is abusive. A complete opposite of me." He lowly said. "Many people were afraid of me, gossiping that I beat someone up, I injured someone, I sent someone in the state of comatose, I stole, then other things."

 

His next words made me freeze.

 

"One day I come back to my senses with blood all over me and a dead body just an inch away."

 

My spoon dropped and I could feel my heart beating so fast.

 

"I don't mean to scare you Jihoon, I swear it's Daniel! I'm really innocent! Daniel.. Daniel he–" his eyes widened and he started to groan in pain. His breaths were violent and hectic. I regained my sense back so I went closer to him and placed my hands on his shoulder. He hung his head low, mumbling things I couldn’t hear.

 

"Euigeon! Are you okay?" I was getting worried with his situation. "Do you want to–"

 

"Shut up!" He shouted and I was kicked away from him. Clutching my stomach in pain I look at the person.

 

_Is that.. Daniel?_

I stared at him, Daniel was wriggling himself free from the chair. His expressions were so terrifying. He was screaming and tears were starting to travel down his cheeks. He looked so pitiful and it broke my heart seeing his state like that. I've seen other patients but his case triggered me the most. I could see red and evil beneath his eyes and he was scaring me. He looked like a complete lunatic.

 

"Daniel! You'll fall!"

 

Not even thinking twice, I ran towards him and grabbed his shoulders to keep him in place. He stopped moving and glared at me dangerously. He gave out heavy breaths, thinking that he had calmed down, my eyes soften at the sight of him.

 

_Bite._

 

I screamed in pain and I tried to get my arm away from his teeth. His teeth were getting deeper and deeper and It hurts so bad. I could feel my skin ripping off. After some struggles I managed to get myself away. I can see a bite mark on my arms and drops of blood. I cried in pain and I could see Daniel giving me a psychotic smile. He screamed, because I was scared and I was in so much pain.

 

I tried to breathe normally, to calm down because I had to fix my wound before it gets worse. After I felt my arm numbing, I slowly stood up. I walked into one of the cabinets where I think they kept the first aid kit. After finding it I moved to the sink and washed my arm. It stings so much, I hissed In pain then heard Daniel snickering, definitely exposing his sadistic self. I examined my arm, it looks so bad and I never knew he could do something this horrible– especially with merely his teeth. I let the waters run down my arm for a while.

 

"Fuck!" I quickly turned around in shock and saw Daniel was in pain just like Euigeon before. He had his head low again, stomping and screaming.

 

_Is Euigeon coming back?_

 

"E- Euigeon! You fucking asshole!" He screamed, even more chaotic than Euigeon. He clearly didn't want to let Euigeon go back just yet. I couldn't move at my spot, I was too scared to go and help him. Daniel was turning red from anger then he eventually fell. His screams stopped.


	3. Chapter 3

A week after the incident, I kept visiting him as if nothing happened but he soon enough found out that Daniel had harmed me and told me not to visit him anymore. Of course, I didn't comply to his wish. I can see that he was scared to hurt me again because I was too kind to him. But I promised to follow him every time he tells me to leave when he would feel Daniel coming. 

 

Spending my everyday with Euigeon, I became even closer to him during those days. I was too engrossed in taking care of him that Dr. Kim said I'll be his permanent caretaker instead. I was so happy.

 

“What are you doing here?” he asked me rather coldly, I almost mistook him for Daniel.

 

“Taking care of you,” I said, reaching for his back to unlock the cuffs.

 

“I believe I told you yesterday not to come anymore,” He shakes my hands off him.

 

“Sorry to break it to you, but in case you didn’t know I’m your permanent caretaker,” I tried again and he gave up. I unlocked his cuffs so he could stand up before I cuff his hands again with a new one.

 

I tugged the leash and ushered him to follow me. I locked his room and we walked down the hallway. Both of us didn’t speak, but we shared a comfortable silence. It didn’t take too long for us to reach another room.

 

Well you see, today is Euigeon’s bath time schedule.

 

We went inside to one of the large cubicles and I locked the door inside. Euigeon was just looking down and being quiet. I know that he’s still upset with himself so I touched his shoulder, he flinched and looked at me in the eyes. He was sad, I see it.

 

“I’m fine, I promise,” I showed him my bandaged arm but he didn’t seem to be convinced.

 

“I really hate it when people get hurt because of me,” he lowly said, making my heart drown in sadness with him, “I’m starting to doubt if this hospital would be able to help me,”

 

“I will help you,”

 

“I don’t want to hurt you,”

 

“No matter what you say I’ll never leave you alone,” I sounded really cheesy and I could feel myself blush but that’s what I truly felt about him. Care.

 

I walked to the tub and opened the faucet to fill it up. I made sure that the water is warm enough. I went back to him and helped him undress after uncuffing his hands. I did this a lot of times to other patients but I couldn’t breathe properly when I undress Euigeon. Euigeon doesn’t seem to mind one bit that he’s going to go bare in front of me. Just as I expected, he has a nice body. My face was getting hot when he finally got his clothes off. I shakily cuffed him again.

 

Looking away in an instant, I mentally cursed myself for being a mess in front of him, “G-go to the t-tub,”

 

Once I heard the water splashing gently, I faced him again with confidence and turned off the water. I sat on a chair behind him and took the mini shower head and told him I’ll be wetting his head. I lathered his hair with shampoo, gently massaging his head to erase all his worries. Dr. Kim told me that bath times are necessary in the remedy. It helps them in calming their nerves and making them feel better.

 

“That.. feels good,” He sighs in contentment.

 

I felt happy knowing that. I smiled and rinsed the shampoo off his hair.

 

I took the scrubber with some soap and rubbed his back. His skin felt really smooth and his body was so strong under my hands. I could see his muscles and I realized that his shoulders were so broad. He was the ideal man. I couldn’t stop blushing and my heart was going crazy. I stood up and continue to scrub his arms and his toned chest. I couldn’t believe I am touching a nice body of a man.

 

“C-could you stand up?” I cleared my throat.

 

And I swear I thought I was going to faint. I tried to keep my composure when he faced his body towards me. I started to scrub his stomach that still has a faint outline of his abs. Then I proceeded to his legs. I started from his thighs down to his ankles. I couldn’t breathe at this point because I kept seeing his thing.

 

I looked up to him and he was looking back at me with clouded gaze. He looked away, blushing. He looked so cute.

 

“I’m sorry about that, it gets like that when I feel good,”

 

“U-uh.. yeah..”

 

I let him sit again so I could rinse him. After that, he stepped out from the tub and I wiped him dry. I dressed him up and working with his cuffs.

 

“Jihoon,”

 

I looked at him and hummed in response.

 

“Promise me you’ll go when Daniel would come,”

 

I gave him a reassuring smile, his feelings were genuine about me and I can’t help but feel loved.

 

Unlike our previous patients, I was the most comfortable with Euigeon. In just a few days I didn't fear him anymore. I talk to him a lot and he does too. I eventually opened my heart to him, I knew I was getting attached, I knew he would be very important to me. He haven't done a lot but making me smile was more than anything.

 

Spending time with Euigeon made me realize I missed the feeling of someone to laugh and smile with. I was left alone by my parents and now I lived alone in a room in the hospital and I had no one to talk to, even Dr. Kim because he was too busy. I also realized that I love caring for someone. I want someone to smile because of me because that way I could see my worth as a person. Euigeon makes me brighter each day, renewing me each day, and he was doing the most part of my part. I am really thankful to have met him.

 

Even after a month of me taking care of Euigeon was a bliss. My heart started to pound every time I think about visiting him in his white room. I got more and more excited about going to his room. There was never a day I got tired of his bright smile and adorable laughs.

 

I love being by his side.

 

I have always wondered what could be reason behind my heart squeezing and thumping rather quickly when I see or think of him. I would feel myself blush and get overly excited somehow.

 

 

 

 

 

"Hey there, ready to sleep?" I said as I opened the door to his room one night. Euigeon was still sitting on his chair with his usual smile. I smiled at the sight then locked the metal door.

 

I walked towards him and I blushed when he eyes my every move. He does that every time but I still couldn't get used to it. I felt really conscious, I hope he wouldn't hear the loud thumps of my heart, the room was always deafeningly silent, I feel bad for him for hearing nothing but silence. It was another reason why I want to keep him company.

 

I looked for the keys in my pocket, walking  towards Daniel and unclasping his cuffs. I trust Euigeon so much that I would set him free when he goes to bed. I know that he won't hurt me.

 

"Let's go," I patted his cheeks gently. Something I always do to him.

 

He looked up to me slowly, his brown orbs staring into mine. I raised my brows wanting him to tell me what was wrong. He didn't open his mouth, he was just motionless staring at me. I was starting to get uneasy. He never did this to me before, so, why?

 

Starting to blush, I tried to look elsewhere and scratched the back of my neck. My eyes led its way back to Daniel's eyes, his lips still slightly parted, I blushed even more when thinking about his plump lips. I licked my lips, and tried to break the silence. He was staring at me for a good one minute.

 

"Euigeo–"

 

"I’ve been meaning to tell you this but–” He cut me off, “–did you know your eyes had taken away all the stars in the sky?" He whispered.

 

_Huh?_

 

I was taken aback by his sudden words, I could feel the heat on my cheeks. I gulped and our eyes were still locked at that moment. Shallow breaths filled the room and all of a sudden I feel my arms being touched, I feel my body moving forward, feeling my lips crashing against someone's.

 

It's Euigeon's lips.

 

With just that one kiss, I realized that all along this heart was beating affectionately for him. All those butterflies were all because of him. Those laugh and smile, all because of him. My feelings were all because of him. He was the origin of my everything.

 

I never knew that I needed his kiss and his love. I was too focused on him I didn't get to realize my feelings. He was hypnotizing me with everything he his. I'm always drawn into him every time we meet. I never knew that I would fall for him, I never knew he would kiss me like this. And again, with just that one kiss, he made me realize all of these things.

 

"E-Euigeon I–"

 

He didn't even want me to speak, smacking his lips back on mine. For some reason, I was sitting on his lap. His lips moved gently on mine. Savoring each and every taste, each and every inch of my lips. I could feel all the affection in his kiss. I was too timid to kiss back– heck, I didn't even know how to kiss. I was trying to tell him but he rudely cut me off. Euigeon was taking the lead, tugging my bottom lip and nibbling on it.

 

Is it just me or the room is getting hotter?

 

"Just follow me." He whispered on my ear and nibbled on my earlobe. His hands roams inside my shirt, I let out a squeak, feeling his tongue lick my ears. Deciding to aim my neck, He bit my skin and sucked on it harshly, earning loads of my moans. He kissed my neck, then my throat, then my lips.

 

He smiled at me.

 

"I really, really like you."

 

_I do too.._

Then capturing my lips again, this time I kissed back. Mentally telling myself to mimic what he does. I don't want to embarrass myself in this such small thing. I don't want him to stop kissing me either. I put all my emotions in our lip-locking. Trying to pour all my best into kissing him.

 

His lips were getting faster and faster so I gripped on his shoulders harder, making sure to keep up with him. I was suddenly lifted up, wrapping my legs around his waist as he leads me somewhere.

 

The next thing I felt was my back hitting the soft mattress of his bed. I panted for air– my eyes asking him for a timeout. This moment was too good to be true. I felt so small and submissive under him. I didn't know that I craved for something like this to happen. I never had this so much affection for someone, I had no idea that this was already called love.

 

Yet he just smiles at me so warmly and brushes strands of my hair away from my face.

 

"Pretty,"

 

I smacked him lightly, pouting and he just smiles and chuckles at me quietly.

 

"Go to sleep now," I told him.

 

"Will you sleep with me?" He grabbed my hand and kissed the back of it while initiating an eye contact.

 

"Euigeon you do know I can't.. sleep with you here." I bitterly said. I might get in trouble if they found out I'm having a thing with a patient.

 

"Such a shame there," he frowned, caressing my face with the back of his hand. "You should cuff me again, I can feel Daniel coming."

 

And so I left him there hand-cuffed on the bed, but of course not without a long goodnight kiss and flushed smiles.

 

During my way back to my room the smile from my lips were too hard to conceal and I was blushing like crazy. As soon as I flopped on my bed I was squealing so bad and fireworks were blasting inside my chest. It was the best day of the life. The day I genuinely felt so happy and the day I genuinely felt loved.


	4. Chapter 4

After that certain night with Euigeon I couldn't stop the blush forming on my cheeks every time I visit him. I would be so happy- we would be so happy being in each other's company. The days kept passing by with us laughing breathlessly and smiling. Kissing has also become one of our routine. I would straggle his lap and we'll kiss all day long.

 

"I guess fresh air really makes me feel so light weighted," he stated when I took him out to the garden.

 

No one really comes to this garden, well except for the gardener who tends it from time to time. Today was her day-off (I secretly checked her schedules so I could bring Euigeon here).

 

"You look beautiful under the sun,"

 

A blushed crept through my cheeks, "E-Euigeon!," I felt so embarrassed when he compliments me.

 

He chuckled and looked around him while I recover from the butterflies. There were more flowers on the other side so I grabbed the handles and pushed his wheelchair forward. I would love to show him this garden even more when I saw how soft his eyes were while scanning the area. He must have taken a liking to it.

 

We ended up under the large tree that covers us from the sun. A wind slowly blew towards us and I stared at Euigeon’s features. The wind ruffles his hair, he closes his eyes shut. And when he opens his eyes again, the wind stopped blowing. I looked at his eyes from the side, it wasn’t focusing on the flowers scattered around us. His eyes shows a glint of sadness and worry.

 

I placed my palm on his shoulder, he looks up at me, quick to hide away the evidence of his negative thoughts. “What’s wrong?” I asked. “What’s troubling you?”

 

He looked surprised, but he smiles at me nonetheless, “It’s just that..” the wind started to blow against us, “..you look so lovely, you are wonderful,” he reached his cuffed hands to cup my face (instead of cuffing it at his back, I cuffed it in front of him this time).

 

I was expecting for him to open up to me, but suddenly it all didn’t matter anymore. I was caught up with his sweet nothings, I was again sucked up in this lovesick state of mine. I entwined our fingers together and sat on my usual place– his lap.

 

“Stop telling me that, I’m getting embarrassed,” I buried my face on his neck.

 

“Why? You deserve it,” his mumbled against my ears. “look at me,”

 

I lift up my blushing face. He leaned closer and softly placed his lips against mine. He grabbed my waist and I wrap my arms around his neck. We kissed softly and passionately. It was so romantic I’m sure I was beyond smitten by now.

 

I never had someone to love like this, I never had someone who had showed me so much love before. I was new to all of this and it felt so amazing. I couldn’t decide whether the fireworks were comfortable or not but all I care is that someone was giving me the warmth I longed for. He gave me the things I never knew I had before. It was too early to decide this but I think Euigeon would be the first and last person I would love.

 

 

 

 

 

I accidentally encountered Daniel when I was feeding Euigeon one afternoon. He told me to go but it was too late. I stay stunned as Daniel glared fires at me, helplessly trying to get away from the cuffs.

 

"So I see, you and Euigeon huh?" He spat. I nodded, blushing at the thought of Euigeon.

 

 _Oh stop it Jihoon._ I mentally smacked myself.

 

"I'm sorry,"

 

He raised his eyebrows. I'm really not sure why I apologized, it just came out like an instinct. He raised his eyebrows and stopped moving. His eyes softens a little but I don't want to get fooled.

 

"Do me a favor, come over here."

 

"You.. would hurt me,"

 

He looked somewhere else, probably thinking about something.

 

"Give me a kiss, that's what I'm asking,"

 

Am I hearing things correctly? Why on earth is he asking for a kiss? I was stunned and my heart started to beat quickly. Euigeon used to ask for my kisses too. I didn't want to kiss Daniel, I'm afraid of him.  _What 's up with him?_

 

“W-what? What are you saying?” I dropped the spoon, "You'll bite me, I- I don't want to."

 

He rolled his eyes and gritted his teeth. "Just come. over. here."

 

"But–"

 

"Why the fuck are you being so stubborn?!" He practically screamed at me, his voice echoing inside the room. It sent me shivers and I felt like crying. "Come here," he tried one more time and with a low and softer voice this time. He seemed determine to get me to come to him.

 

I stood up quietly and slowly move towards him. I didn't want to make Daniel mad again, if I want to be with Euigeon I must at least get along with Daniel. I should try to make Daniel fall for me or at least accept me.

 

"On my lap,"

 

And so I did.

 

"You.. smell really good."

 

I yelped when Daniel buried his face into my neck. I blushed furiously, it's the first time I was experiencing Daniel being this affectionate and touchy. It felt satisfying and relieving.

"Such a pretty white skin,"

 

Daniel started to place my skin in the middle of his lips. He started to nibble and lick my skin, my breath hitches every time he does it. I could feel my neck getting numb with his biting and sucking. I can feel myself tremble and submit to Daniel. For the first time, I let my guard down and let him plant more bruises and kisses on my neck.

 

Daniel wasn't contented on my neck so he attempted to expose my right shoulder by biting my shirt down. Licking stripes on my collar bone and into my shoulder blades was arousing. I could feel myself getting hot. Daniel bit my shoulder and accidentally let out a moan, pulling away from him and covered my mouth. I just let out an embarrassing sound in front of him.

 

"Come back here," he growled.

 

I was breathing frantically and I'm not sure if I want to go back and let him plant more hickeys. But as I said before, I didn't want to make Daniel mad and this is the perfect chance for me to try to get along with him. I moved closer to him again and exposed my shoulder even more to his hungry eyes. His eyes glistened at the sight of my skin. Closing in to my skin I could feel his warm breath again and he attacked my skin almost immediately.

 

"Such a beautiful skin, _Jihoon_." He mumbled against my tainted shoulder. He planted soft kisses in each hickeys that he made. Every lip action sends echoes throughout the room. I could hear the cuffs dangling, I looked down and I could sense that he wanted to touch me so bad, I could hear him scraping the back of his chair. He growled in disappointment yet he still attempted to break free. I was too engrossed with his intimate actions I forgot I have my hands on his shoulder and hair, gripping ever so tightly.

 

When does he plan to stop?

 

_"Mine,"_

 

My once shut eyes opened itself in surprise.

 

Did I just hear him correctly?

 

"D-Daniel!" I screamed my voice out, no longing feeling his soft lips but his teeth piercing through my shoulder. He suddenly attacked me and bit me. It was so painful I wanted him to stop. "Stop it! I- It hurts Daniel!" I wanted to get off but the more I pull away the more painful it gets. I was crying and yelling–  _it really hurts_. Something wet glided down my skin.

 

I tried punching him but my arms felt weak of the pain. Using all of my energy I tried to pinch his arms and he winced in pain. When I felt his teeth loosen up a bit I quickly dropped myself on the floor. Heaving heavy breaths as I look at him with fear. My eyes were getting blurry, and my shoulder hurt so bad.

 

"You're really interesting, no wonder Euigeon got his eyes on you." he licked the blood off his lips and my heart burned with anger.

 

I was so mad and upset I stood up and punched him as hard as I can, making him unconscious. All my hope of Daniel to like me disappeared like dust.

 

My blood was still dripping and so does my tears.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angst ahead

I wasn't allowed to see Euigeon– or Daniel for two weeks. They had my shoulder stitched up. The pain subsided quickly and instantly replaced by a longing sensation. I wanted to see Euigeon, I missed him too much. I told Dr. Kim that I will be more careful and it was just an accident. He didn't seem to buy my words, so it took a lot of begging for him to allow me again. He sighed, _'you seem to like this Euigeon guy a lot, but you can't avoid Daniel though,'_  he said.

 

Two weeks was too heavy for my heart. Every night I would cry to bed, thinking about Euigeon. _Is he missing me? Is he thinking about me? Or.. is he fond of the temporary caretaker?_ The latter opened the faucet in my eyes every time I think about it. I can't seem to stop thinking about the possibilities that may happen.

 

That night I came to conclusion that I wanted Euigeon even if it means that I would have to deal with Daniel. I become to attached, too intoxicated with this kind of twisted relationship. I was in need of love and warmth and I got all those from Euigeon. I couldn’t stand the thought of him leaving me or me leaving him.

 

 

 

 

"Jihoon?" even though the voice was so small I was able to hear it. It sent a pang in my already throbbing heart.

 

I sadly smiled as I slowly shut the door behind me. His current state made my soul drop. His eyes were puffy and red, his face was swollen, full of sadness– _just like mine._

 

" _Jihoon_ ," he repeated, trying to get closer to me but was unable due to the strong cuffs restricting him. The frustration made his voice crack and ends up crying almost instantly and helplessly– his breathing getting heavier each time I take a step towards him. He kept repeating my name over and over again.

 

I teared up at the sight of him, he didn't forget me at all, instead he missed me so much– so much he became like this. The thought made my heart flutter and so I quickly moved to hug him tight. I couldn’t help but bawl my eyes out.

 

"I'm sorry, I'm __so_ sorry,_" He chanted and buried his face on the crook of my neck. His tears were too much I can feel it soaking my shirt. "It's me, E- _Euigeon_." He cried, a pleading voice.

 

"I know," I soothed his messy locks and kissed his forehead.

 

"The caretaker was so mean to me, I missed you so much Jihoon you have no idea, I feel like dying," he choked out. "But knowing that I hurt you.. I really want to die, _Jihoon._ "

 

I heard my heart shattering into tiny pieces.

 

"What are y-you saying?" I can't believe the temporary caretaker told him about what Daniel did to me. Now Euigeon was even more troubled. "Don't say that."

 

"Just kill me already," he looked into my eyes, seriously begging me to take his life away. "If you don't want to do it.. I'll just–"

 

"Why the fuck are you saying these things?!" My tears were flowing endlessly, I don't want Euigeon to leave my life.

 

"Jihoon, Daniel killed people, I don't want him killing you too." He whispered, "I love you so much you deserve better than me, you deserve happiness. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you. I love you. _I love you Jihoon._ Our time may have been short but I cherished each and every second that I'm with you so that's why.. _please_ live a beautiful and happy life." he was shaking uncontrollably and I want to make it stop.

 

"Euigeon, listen to me." I grabbed his shoulders and looked into his wet orbs. "You are my life I want to spend every second of my life with you. As petty as it sounds you're the only who made me feel like this. I would do everything to make Daniel accept me."

 

I kissed his tears away, tasting the sadness on my lips. I want him to trust me, I want him to glance into the bright side and change his mindset. I want him to stay by my side, hold my hand and assure me that everything's going to be alright. I just want to spend my eternity with him.

 

It was way past midnight and I should be sleeping but I'm here making myself busy with Euigeon's lips. I was trying my best to calm him down, to let him know I’m here, to let him know how much I love him. All of those through this emotional kiss.

 

 

 

 

 

One day, I begged Euigeon to let me see Daniel. I wanted to talk to him. I want to know why was he being like this to me. I need to know something in order for me to think of a solution. Euigeon was against it, obviously. I had to recite all the pros to make him understand. Now I’m sitting in front of Daniel who looked nothing but angry.

 

"Daniel, do you hate me?" 

 

He raised his brow and smirked at me.

 

"Do I?" he sing-songs.

 

"But you keep hurting me whenever you appear." At that moment I thought my fingers were the most fascinating thing I've ever seen as I couldn't stop looking at them. Well, I was too burdened to look into his eyes.

 

"I don't have an exact answer to that, you just have that.. _something_.. that overwhelms my self-control." He glared at me. "You have something.. something that gets on my nerves all the time, Park Jihoon."

 

 

 

 

 

On a broad daylight I decided to visit Euigeon even though it's far from the usual time I go. I just wanted to give him something as a way of celebrating our 6th month since the day I met him. Walking down the plain white walls, humming to a song I've been loving. I might look so stupid smiling and humming like crazy but I just couldn't wait to give him this present. My heart flutters, guessing what kind of reaction I would be getting. I was my first time giving some thing to another person so I didn’t know what to expect.

 

Clutching unto the gift tightly I heard some yelling.

 

"Let me go! what the fuck?!" The voice boomed and echoes throughout the walls. "Where are you taking me you assholes?!"

 

Hearing the metal and wheels moving I ran towards the direction of the sound, wanting to see what was the commotion all about. From a distance I could see people running towards me. I fastened my pace to see who was resisting the doctors.

 

Seeing a dirty blonde hair in a distance made me stop in my tracks. My heart dropped and so does the present in my arms. The group of people passed towards me. I could see Daniel glaring at me. There was blood all over his mouth and shirt.

 

It was the first time Daniel was rushed outside the ward. He must have done something terribly wrong. I guessed his sin in my mind and my blood run cold, thinking that it must be it. The thought of what could they do to Daniel made me cold and dizzy.

 

"Park Jihoon?" A staff came towards me. He was pushing someone on a wheelchair– It was the temporary caretaker. The caretaker had a bite on his arm and he was bleeding so bad, hissing and grunting at the non-subsiding pain.

 

"He was looking for you," The caretaker tells me, “he was raging, screaming, and stomping, he was yelling for you,”

 

I look at the ground in disbelief, "W-Where are they taking him?"

 

"B-2"

 

I asked them why.

 

"He's getting worse, Jihoon. He's not taking his medication and Daniel appears frequently which was the opposite that Euigeon wished for." The staff holding him stated his condition and I felt really bad. "You weren't reporting these kind of stuff Jihoon, that's why it came to this.“

 

_No._

 

“What happened to you?"

 

"I'm.. I'm sorry."

 

Realization hit me. I was too engrossed about Euigeon that I forgot that he still needs to be treated. I felt so bad, a simple apology was all I could muster out.


	6. Chapter 6

Eleven at night I found myself walking to a restricted place. It was where they deal with difficult patients. No one knew that I was going here, no one should know. In this time, little by little the doctors are off to sleep. The guard should be my problem but since I was known friendly to them it won't be much of a problem.

 

"Jihoon? What are you doing here?" The guard asks me as soon as he recognized me from the dark

 

"Dr. Kim sent me to bring some medications to one of the patients."

 

Giving me a suspicious look, I made sure not to change my expressions even though I was becoming nervous. "Where is he? it's dangerous to go in alone."

 

"He had some other duties to do, he told me to go in alone because a patient is only fond of me. He’s a special case," I explained. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine Mr. Lee.”

 

"Make it quick." He gives in, smiles and lets me inside.

 

Giving him a small thanks as I let myself enter the building, it was as easy as I expected. The building was the same as the main building, tall and white but lonelier and scarier. This building was built for patients with worse cases, patients who are beyond control. I want to find Euigeon fast, I want to see him, I _need_  to see him.

 

Walking all alone in this building still gives me shivers. My footsteps echoes behind me and I could feel eyes following each and every move that I take. Patients are banging the doors as I walk past them and some were screaming. I was the center of their attention and I felt really awful and creeped out.

 

I let my feet drag me to the lower ground floor. I walked quietly into the dark walls and peeking at each window. I started to sweat as the patients were scary as hell each time I peek through the windows looking for Euigeon. Some are suddenly vomiting, laughing hysterically, drooling bubbles, and such. I fastened up my pace, I want to see Euigeon so bad.

 

Stopping at a certain door my heart skipped a beat knowing that this was the right room. Seeing his dirty blonde head hung down from the outside I teared up at the sight of it. Even with the walls separating us I could feel the pain and sorrow he was feeling, I felt even worse.

 

Unlocking the door with the key that I stole from Dr. Kim's room, I slowly pushed the door. Euigeon– or Daniel flinched at the sound. He looked up slowly but I couldn't see his face because of the darkness surrounding us. I walked closer and his breathing was getting hectic as I move closer. Choked sobs echoes in the room and it stabbed my heart a lot.

 

"Euigeon.. it's me."

 

"I'm not Euigeon." He whispers.

 

It caught me off guard because Daniel didn't seem to be the type to cry. I knelt in front of him and cupped his face. It was wet with blood and tears and his whole body was trembling-  _so cold_. It angered me that they did something this cruel to Daniel. He doesn't deserve this pain, this hospital is doing no good to both Euigeon and Daniel. I want to take him away from here.

 

"Let's run away." I proposed to him.

 

Daniel simply looked at me with tired eyes. Feeling sympathetic, I cupped his face with my trembling hands. His warm cheeks now felt so cold and now so hollow.

 

“Why..?”

 

I tilted my head in confusion as if the answer was too obvious, “why? Because I love you,” I smiled warmly.

 

But he moves his face away from my palms, I worried if I had said something wrong.

 

“I hurt you, countless of times Jihoon,”

 

It’s true, but I made my mind up to love them both. I grabbed his cheeks again and planted a soft kiss on his cheek.

 

“I still love you, what can I do about that?”

 

“It’s Euigeon that you love, not me, not Daniel,” he growls, he was still crying, “ _Fuck_ , what are you doing to me Jihoon,” he scoffs.

 

I was taken aback. Even he doesn’t know why he’s crying. Daniel drops his head low and stays quiet.

 

"What did they do to you?" I whispered. I could also feel the waters forming in my eyes. I swept his fringe away from his face, revealing more of his wounds and bruises. I kissed his forehead and told him I would save him from this place.

 

"-n.."

 

I couldn't catch his words so I hummed in question.

 

"Jihoon,"

 

"What is it?"

 

Daniel pecked my lips and I blushed at his shameless act. His lips were trembling but still as soft as a pillow. That kiss felt really genuine from Daniel considering how he treated me badly before. My heart swelled at the hope of him loving me back.

 

As much as I wanted to cuddle and kiss him I need to get him out of this hospital fast and go to somewhere where they can't find us

 

 

 

 

 

I once aspired to be a famous actor mimicking the people in the television since I was young, I never thought of using it to fool people like this– we got a free ride. A simple act of sympathy and pretending that Daniel was about to die behind my back was just a piece of cake.

 

I thanked the driver for dropping us off in a place where Daniel told me he used to have a home. The house was huge, and surprisingly there were no signs of robbery or anything suspicious even though Daniel was caged in the hospital for a year and a few months.

 

"That hurts," Daniel hissed and I froze in fear. 

 

"I'm sorry," I dropped the cotton and mentally cursed myself for being so clumsy.

 

The silence was so awkward I feel under Daniel's gaze. I stayed still, not knowing what I should do. The mansion was definitely shining and shimmering in gold yet my eyes were dropped low, unable to appreciate its beauty.

 

Daniel stands up and walks upstairs. I followed him even though I was still scared of him– I want to make things right somehow.

 

"Daniel," I called out but he continues walking to what I guess was his bedroom, “Daniel,” I called out again.

 

He takes off the shirt from the hospital and I blushed. He doesn’t seem to be noticing me standing in the doorway. The room was dark but I could see the blood on his torso. I quickly went to get a wet towel and run back to him. He had changed into something comfortable, he still doesn’t have a shirt on though.

 

He was now sitting on a chair and I took that as my cue to start cleaning his upper body. I wiped his back clean first, my puffy eyes started to shed tears again, seeing how the whip marked his back angrily. It was so red, I grazed my fingers over it before treating it with some ointment.

 

“They’re so mean to you, I’m so sorry..”

 

Starting on his front, I first took his arms to wipe the dirt and more blood, treating the wounds and giving his arms a bandage for his open wounds. It’s the same with his chest and stomach area, wiping and treating it gently. I still couldn’t stop crying. Daniel who had his eyes on the ground for a long time let his eyes fall on me.

 

“Stop crying,” He lowly says,

 

He tilted my chin upward to make me look at him in the eyes. His eyes were still as tired as before but it was full of something I couldn't place my finger on.

 

He kissed me.

 

Softly and gently.

 

And so I wrapped my arms around his neck.

 

That night, I was 18 and I submitted myself completely to both Euigeon and Daniel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut next chapter *drum rolls*


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can skip this chapter  
> warning: smut, rough, bdsm.

 

"Daniel.." I hummed worriedly. "I-I thought we're going to sleep?"

 

"Let me kiss you," he growls under his breath.

 

Daniel kisses me on my neck, I trembled a little bit as the memories of him biting me enters my mind. But I trust him now. He licks strips of my skin and his hand roams around inside my shirt.

 

"Ah.. _Daniel.._ " I closed my eyes shut, my skin felt so sensitive under his touch. My skin was burning, burning me even more with his gentle finger tips.

 

He started to suck on my skin, licking and biting until he finally leaves an angry bruise, whispering __'_ mine',_ making me blush furiously. He took off my shirt and starts to nip on my chest. I grabbed his hair and opened my mouth to moan.

 

"D-Daniel I can't— _ahhh.._ " the hand that was roaming on my chest slid down to the front of my pants. My legs trembled as he softly squeeze my hardened bulge.

 

"Hey Jihoon," sweetly he says but his eyes contradict his tone— that made me even more aroused. " _I want you_ ,"

 

I flutter my eyes open to look at him dizzily in the eyes.

 

"Do you want me?"

 

 _Me?_ I panted and stared at him. His eyes were dark, full of desire- and most of all, anticipant. I kept silent but my heart didn't. It was also screaming with want, syncing together with Daniel's eagerness. I love Daniel and Euigeon so much, I would love to do everything with him, to always be with him. I want Daniel and Euigeon, but I'm not sure if this is the kind of want I want.

 

Nonetheless, I wanted to feel Daniel too.

 

"I—I do Daniel, I really do."

 

_If this is how they show love to their partners, I would gladly make love to you._

 

Daniel only need those words to start groping me in different places. Our lips connected again into a luscious kiss. Erotic and heated. He unbuttoned my pants and in an instant, he pulled them down until it's left on the floor.

 

I wanted to push Daniel and cover myself up but he already had his grip on my hardened length. His hand was quickly moving, too hurried to feel my aching length. I had no time to feel embarrassed as the pleasure quickly started to kick it. Making me spill white bit by bit.

 

I shuddered, and thrusts my hips together with his hand. But the action didn’t seem to make him happy.

 

"No, don't move Jihoon,"

 

_Huh?_

 

He pressed his hands down my hip so I couldn't move. It was making me frustrated since my lower region was hurting, wanting some friction.

 

I couldn't control myself, I didn't mean to but my hips was fighting the force on Daniel's hand. He was painfully stroking me— it was making me go insane I could scream and cry.

 

" _Jihoon_." Sternly he says.

 

"I.. I'm sorry, I d-didn't mean to—"

 

"Turn around," I obeyed with no more questions.

 

I felt a cloth being wrapped around my eyes, my eyes widens as Daniel blocks my view. I couldn't see anything but black. I felt cautious and nervous of what could be happening around me at the moment.

 

"D-Daniel I'm scared.."

 

I felt his hand bringing my wrists together, a leather scrapes along my wrists and it tightens until I was unable to move my wrists. A belt.

 

I was again pushed to the couch, making me sit normally with the soles of my feet flat on the ground.

 

There was a silent for a minute and I don't know where he could be. "Daniel?" I blindly looked around, looking for him.

 

A few seconds has passed again and I felt two hands gripping my thighs rather painfully, pushing my legs down with all his force and then I heard his mouth open.

 

And his mouth wraps itself around my length I curled my toes and screamed in agony.

 

"I-It's cold Daniel, it's c-cold!" I panicked, trying to wriggle myself free but Daniel was so determined to keep me in place.

 

Daniel kept bobbing his head up and down, the ice cube was hitting my head and my underside. I could feel it melting and coldly running down to my sac, making me even more dizzy and weak. I was panting rather quickly and breathily.

 

My head hits the sofa and I opened my mouth for a bigger passage of air. Everything felt so sensual and being blindfolded makes you feel things even more vivid. The cold on my shaft was too much, I was focusing on nothing but the coldness down there. I might just as well come for good.

 

"That melted a lot faster than I expected," Daniel pulls his lips from my shaft and I tried to calm myself down as I wait for another action.

 

He closes his lips around my head again and an ice cube was left on my tip. I cried and begged him to stop, it was being too painfully pleasurable. Too pleasurable that it hurts. My length was twitching and spilling more liquid then Daniel shoves my length into his whole mouth. I froze as I felt two ice cubes circling shaft.

 

"S-stop it! Daniel— _Ahhh,_ "

 

I wanted to grip something but my hands were restricted to do anything. I ended up scratching my own palms to help me bear with the over flowing sensation.

 

The ice cube melted after some time and I never felt more relieved. Daniel started to take me even more deeply, I could feel the back of his throat and his teeth scrapes along my bulging veins. I wanted to tangle my fingers on his hair so bad.

 

As I was nearing, Daniel started to suck my tip hard and lap it from time to time. He was so good at orals and I came hard inside his mouth without any warning. I panted deeply, too tired from taking it all at once.

 

"Don't be so relaxed Jihoon, we're not done yet,"

 

He gave me a few licks here and there, probably cleaning me up. My length was twitching, hardening again.

 

My body was lifted up, he has his hand on my thighs and the other on my back. I could smell his scent strongly and I felt so intoxicated by it. But, _ _where is he taking me?__

 

"You taste so good Park Jihoon, makes me want some more of you," he licks my cheek and I blushed at the action.

 

I heard a door open and my body was placed on a soft mattress.

 

"Jihoon, did that feel good?"

 

 _Yes. Yes Daniel, so good._ I wanted to tell him but my mouth wouldn't open. I feel so sensitive and his voice was not making it even better. I'm at that state where his mere voice can make me come undone.

 

"You think you can make me feel good too?"

 

 _Where is he?_ Everything is all black. But I do hear him taking off his clothes. The fabric was making too much of a noise. I stayed kneeling and waiting.

 

Without warning, my hair was painfully grabbed by him and pushed his thick leaking length past my parted lips, hitting the back of my throat in my first try. I couldn't cough, I choked on it but _why am I liking it?_

 

"Let's see how far my dick can go into that throat of yours, hm?"

 

His was too much, I thought my mouth was going to be ripped apart, he was too big and my heart escalated quickly in nervousness.

 

My body was bent downwards, my length was touching the soft mattress, it was giving me a sweet soft friction and caused me to moan.

 

" _Ah,_ fuck, Jihoon that felt good," he growled and his grip tightened around my hair. "Go on, come suck me,"

 

I endured the bitter taste and bobbed my head slowly up and down, placing my tongue on his underside. I kept it slow and sure since I couldn't see. I prevent it from going far too deep, I don't want to choke myself on him.

 

To be honest, I want to touch Daniel, I want to feel him like how he felt me.

 

I stopped at his head and circled the slit with my warm tongue. Lapping, poking and sucking on it hard. Then I hallowed my cheeks thinking that it might make him feel any better. His constant moans turned into a hiss which made me feel determined.

 

"You're so slow Jihoon, you're driving me crazy,"

 

My hair was tugged again, followed by a harsh thrust from his hips. My eyes widened and watered as I started to choke. He pushed his hips again for the second time and his hands started to tremble along with his hips. My mouth watered and my saliva continued to fall past my lips.

 

More pushes and he started to do it fast and quickly, abusing my throat with his thick shaft. I was coughing but that only made him feel better as I didn't realize the vibrations I'm giving him. He was going in my mouth so deep I could feel my lips touching the skin on his lower abdomen.

 

As he thrusts into my mouth my eyes started to well and fall tears. My whole body shivered and then finally, Daniel came deep inside my mouth. His liquid was overflowing, I know he wanted me to swallow but he was milking me way too much I gagged and tried to pull myself away from him. But the grip on my hair stayed still. I sobbed as his liquid fell down my chin and onto my legs and on my own length.

 

He finally released me and I fall back, coughing and raised my knees close to m chest. I ended up spilling the remaining white liquid from my mouth and hope Daniel wouldn't be mad. I weakly moved my face to wipe my mouth on the sheets.

 

The bed around me shifted and a sudden peck on my lips made me calm down.

 

"You did great Jihoon,"

 

I blushed.

 

"T-Thank you, Daniel," my voice was weak and low since my throat was sore.

 

He gave me even more kisses, nibbling on my bottom lip as his hand wondered down the curves of my body. I gasped when he opens my legs wide open. But my gasp only made his tongue enter my mouth.

 

"W-wait, what i-is that?" I forcefully broke the kiss when I felt something poking my hole.

 

"My finger," and in an instant he inserted one inside me.

 

It was uncomfortable, really uncomfortable. He pushes it in and out of me. While he does that, he continues to kiss me sensually. Daniel let his finger go deeper inside me until I feel his knuckle hitting my rim. He pulled back and slammed it in this time I was stretched bigger. He put two fingers inside of me. I moaned inside Daniel's mouth as it was painful.

 

I could feel the pad of his fingers touching my walls, I felt so violated but I'm loving it. He widens his two fingers and stretches me even more. Tears were forming again and I wanted to let out a sob but Daniel was kissing me so good. After a few more stretching I internally sighed in relief thinking that it was over. But I was wrong when three fingers were now poking against my rim.

 

My eyes widened and the three fingers go in me slowly and messily. I guess Daniel had a hard time stretching me. I stopped kissing when the pain was too much to bear. I panted while it continues to go in. Then finally I felt his knuckles, his fingers was very deep inside of my hole.

 

Daniel smirked against my lips and nibbles on my lip instead of kissing it. It's okay though since my mind was occupied by the pain down there. I felt him getting impatient when he fastens his pace. Pushing his fingers in and out in a fast motion to prepare me quickly.

 

"I can't wait to fuck you,"

 

My heart skipped a beat and I felt myself twitch at those vulgar words.

 

His fingers made me feel full but as he pulled them away I felt kind of empty.

 

"Relax, I promise you'll feel so good Jihoon," he assures me.

 

The bed shifts, and something pokes against my entrance again but I knew it wasn't his fingers this time.

 

Daniel groans and he pushes himself inside of me with difficulty. I bit my bottom lip as the pain was too much, Daniel was too big I doubt it could even fit in me. I started to scratch my palms again to help me bear with the pain.

 

"Fuck, you're so tight, you're bleeding,"

 

_Bleeding?_

"You okay?"

 

It still hurts so much I don't want to stop now so I nodded. He continues to push himself inside me, gripping my hips to make me engulf him whole. We both sighed when Daniel has finally put all of him inside me. My insides felt full and warm.

 

Daniel pushed my fringe away, kisses my forehead and I blushed in return.

 

He didn't warn me, he suddenly rocked his hips, slowly to make me adjust to him even more. He groans and his nails dug into the skin on my hips.

 

"You're so warm Jihoon, you feel so fucking good around my dick, _ah fuck_ ," he hissed and quickens his pace.

 

He grabs one of my legs, forcing me to lay on my side. He enters from my side and I felt my eyes dizzying from the amount of pleasure vibrating through my whole body. He was going deeper and rougher inside me. Turning me into a moaning and crying mess.

 

I wanted to cup my mouth, to conceal the loud noises but I was unable to and so I ended up drooling instead, the roughness was scraping through my insides and it felt so good. I never felt anything like this before.

 

"Feels good fucking a virgin," he growls, turning me again so I was in all fours.

 

He spreads my cheeks and pushes himself inside me again. My own length was leaking and bouncing as Daniel continues to thrust himself inside my hole. I bit on my bottom lip until it bleeds. The pleasure was unbearable especially when you are blindfolded and could only focus on your senses. I realized I was being too loud so I bit on my lip even harder. I don’t want to hear myself voicing out lewd sounds.

 

_Spank._

 

Daniel’s hand slaps my butt painfully and I could feel it sting so much. I choked out a sob of pain.

 

"Moan." He commands.

 

He rams inside me even more harder, thus making me moan my voice out. My body was heating up, Daniel's length was even warm going in and out of me. I started to cry, I sobbed right into the sheets. The blindfold was definitely wet, soaked with tears and sweat. I wanted to see Daniel.

 

Daniel bit my back, sucking and licking, specifically at my shoulder blades. Probably giving me countless of hickeys as I hear him say _ _'_ mine' _repeatedly. Daniel grabs my length and strokes it in a rushed manner. I screamed even more, my voice cracking and getting even more hoarse.

 

"D-Daniel, it's too much, t-this is too much, oh my g-god," I cried out.

 

He keeps stroking my length and I couldn't hold it in any longer. I want to come but as I was going to release Daniel abruptly stopped stroking me and focused on ramming inside me hard and rough. He pulled the belt on my wrist and made me rise from the bed. He tugs at the leather as he thrusts upward. I ended up bouncing back at him because it felt really good. Daniel seemed amused at me trying to give myself more pleasure so he pushed himself in with so much impact until I started to see stars all around my vision.

 

"Daniel!" I warned, feeling his tip hitting that very sweet spot inside of me.

 

Daniel turns me around again, my sweaty back came in contact with the sheets. His lips had found itself on my nipples and started to lick and suck. I breath heavily, I felt like passing out but the sensation was so good, __how could I?__ He did the same to the other, teasing and fingering them. He kissed his way up until he reaches my lips and instantly inserted his tongue in my parted lips.

 

As we kiss, he snaked his hands under my thighs and brought them up to what seems his shoulders. I never knew I could be so flexible. Daniel was now abusing my sweet stop over and over again.

 

"Daniel," I break the kiss, I could hear him panting at the same pace at me. "I.. I want to see you," I plead.

 

With no more questions, he reached to the back of my head and undid my blindfold in a swift motion. He threw the wet cloth out of our sight and I could see him staring darkly at me. Lust so full on his dark orbs. I look on his body and my face couldn’t get even warmer. Seeing his body now was different when I used to help him take a bath back at the hospital. His body was toned, sweaty and the moonlight made his body shine beautifully. My thoughts were gone again the moment he hit my sweet spot.

 

"Why do you look so beautiful when you cry," he groans and his pace quickens.

 

The sound of skin slapping became even more loud as I felt Daniel leaking inside of me, creating this thick sticky feeling on my bottom. I myself is also leaking, there was a pool of liquid on my stomach and it was begging for a release.

 

"Let me hug you Daniel, p- _please_ ,"

 

Daniel hurriedly and messily took off the belt, probably wanting to continue thrusting inside me. And I was right, he started to thrust inside me while he messily fold the belt and threw it on the side, creating a loud metal noise.

 

My wrists were free and as I raise my arms to hug him I saw the bruises formed on them. I didn't mind. It would remind me of this wonderful night with Daniel.

 

"I love you Daniel, " I tell him with all sincerity.

 

Daniel lost it and his pace messed up and he erratically slams against me, losing his rhythm and his hips finally jerks for the last time, he groans and he filled me up with all of his. He stayed deep inside me, making sure I get his all.

 

I came after he did, spilling all over me and Daniel's body. I heavily breathe, eyes wide and feeling myself even more full. Daniel was still coming inside of me. His length softens inside me as he kept coming.

 

"Daniel.." I called.

 

He doesn't respond, he slowly starts to push in and out of me again, making sure he milks me well. "I gave you too much," he comments. I don’t feel any liquid dripping down, he wants me to take it all.

 

We stayed like that for a few more minutes, catching our breath with him still connected in me. He pulls out after I bring down my legs from his shoulders.

 

When he pulls out, the pad of his middle finger covered my hole. He circles the rim, massaging it. He leaned down to kiss my hole after.

 

"I feel so full," I sighed and I felt so exhausted.

 

Daniel grabs his shirt beside him and wiped the mess off of our chest before grabbing a spare blanket on the side. He laid down and pulled me to his side before draping a blanket over us.

 

I weakly pushed myself up and boldly pecked him on the lips.

 

"Goodnight Daniel,"

 

With the moonlight shining over us I swear I could see the redness on his cheeks and the sparkle in his eyes.

 

"Goodnight Jihoon,"

 

I smiled and snuggled close to his chest, my hope was getting bigger.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 _"I love you,"_  he says the second before I was consumed by sleepiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dedicated to lois ahahaha cheer up :*
> 
> \--  
> ok I know you've all been waiting for this smut so here it is. thank for liking this trashy and fic and omg the kudos I love you all  
> btw ph nielwink shippers go order our nielwink fankit! https://twitter.com/NIELWINK_PH/status/1003276723176128512 <3


	8. Chapter 8

I opened my eyes the next morning, all blurry and bright. From the corner of the bed, there was a figure sitting. I guessed that it was Daniel.

 

My vision became clearer, Daniel became more defined in my vision. He was holding a cigarette between his fingers, puffing out the smoke between his lips. His shirt was nowhere to be found but he has his pants on. I rubbed my eyes even more and tried to reach him but my back ached. I whimpered.

 

Daniel might have heard me, he looked at my direction and threw his cigarette out of the window.

 

“You okay?” he grabbed my back and helped me in sitting up. “Did I went too far?”

 

I blushed, shook my head to tell him no.

 

All of a sudden, a pair of lips had crashed into mine, I could smell the cigarette off him, nonetheless, I still kissed back. His palms went to my sides to caress them. I leaned closer, deeper into the kiss. His hands went even further down until in reaches my bottom, I realized I was still naked.

 

I broke the kiss and covered myself with the soft white blanket.

 

“I.. I’ll make some breakfast after I go change..”

 

Daniel gave me a peck on my cheeks before walking outside the bedroom.

 

Daniel’s behaviour is really questionable. But maybe it was because I took him out of the hospital that"s why he's like this, or maybe other reasons but what's important is that he's treating me nicely and carefully.

 

I feel loved by Daniel.

 

I was overjoyed.

 

Daniel was complimenting the simple breakfast I made for him-- sausages and eggs. He called it as “the best breakfast” he had ever ate and I didn’t believe him, but I still love how he completely flips my heart over just like that.

 

We spent the morning cuddling on the couch, with his arms around me and lazily flipping over the channels. He played with my hands, he touches them gently, placing his thick lips on the bruises and healing wounds on my skin, those of he had inflicted on me. But really, it didn’t matter anymore because me and Daniel are in good terms.

 

Subtle touches turns into kisses-- and eventually into make out sessions on the sofa. I just love how I could feel love radiating from his body. I circled my arms around his neck and pulled him closer.

 

Daniel fell asleep on my lap after getting our lips red and swollen. I touched my lips and smiled.

 

But all of a sudden, a sudden thought came into my mind. Something was missing. I ignored it and continued threading my fingers into the blonde locks of Daniel.

 

Me and Daniel had the same routine for days. Countless touches, kisses and sex. Just full of days expressing our love physically. It felt good.

 

But still, the empty feeling never left me.

 

“What’s wrong?” Daniel asks me when I stopped responding to his kisses.

 

It was midnight and I was once again bare on the mattress with Daniel hovering above me. Daniel moves my head to the side and attacked my neck with even more bruises from the past days. He completely distracted me from my thoughts.

 

“I-It’s nothing.. _hmm._.”

 

“Focus on me.”

 

I closed my eyes again for a long night, discarding my thoughts once again.

 

 

 

 

 

_“Jihoon, I love you,”_

 

 

 

 

 _Euigeon.._ He was the reason why I felt so empty. I opened my eyes, my heart beating in a rapid pace. I looked for Daniel but he was no where to be found. I placed my palms on my forehead, my head aching from last night and from overly thinking about Euigeon.

 

Why didn’t I realize it sooner that Euigeon wasn’t appearing?

 

It was all Daniel all these time. I was too captivated by Daniel finally showing love to me and eventually forgetting about Euigeon’s existence.

 

 _Where was he? Why isn’t he showing up?_ I tried to think.

 

Maybe it was because of the treatment they gave him that Euigeon took long to come back? I spent days with Daniel in the mansion. He took care of me as I was his angel. The way Daniel was in the hospital before was so much different today. He never scolds me and he never dare to harm me anymore. He holds me as I was the last boy in earth.

 

He gives me butterflies every single second. How he steal kisses from me, how he hugs me from behind, how he carry me to bed, made love, or how we cuddle each other when we had nothing to do. He makes me smile and contented with everything I have now.

 

It was such a good thing that I got him out of the hospital and no one seems to care about our disappearance. Meeting him and getting him out of hell were the best things that has ever happened.

 

The new Daniel was so alluring it even made me forget that Euigeon still exists.

 

Daniel comes into our room, all dressed up. He was wearing his Saint Laurent button shirt and a good black jeans.

 

“Good morning,” he smiles. He walks to me and kissed the back of my hand.

 

“Where have you been?” I asked with a fluttering heart. He looks so good.

 

Daniel lifts the paper bags on his left hand smiles. “Bought you breakfast and chocolates,”

 

I suddenly didn’t have the courage to ask him about Euigeon.

 

 

 

 

All throughout the day I couldn’t stop thinking about Euigeon. I know I shouldn’t open up the topic about his other self but I was itching to know what happened or what is going on. Daniel was being lovely to me as usual but my heart wasn’t fluttering like it used to be.

 

I missed him.

 

_Euigeon._

 

"Daniel," I whispered. We were sitting on the bed with my head resting on his shoulder. Daniel was softly playing with my fingers, making me sleepy. "I'm really happy."

 

I knew I was going to risk messing up our relationship.

 

Daniel kissed the top of my head.

 

"But.."

 

He hummed, ushering me to continue.

 

"I wonder what happened to Euigeon,"

 

If I hadn't doze off to sleep that moment I would have noticed his body stiffening beside me.

 

 

 

I would have noticed him stopped playing with my fingers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short update. i am sorry sajdhasjkda i'll make the next chapter longer huhuhuhu  
> forgive me if I only updated now because i was so busy preparing for the concert in MNL.  
> I will finish this fic!! I promise!!
> 
> P.S I MISS WANNAONE ALREADY HUHUHUHHU


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year and i'm very sorry for the very very delayed update TT__TT  
> 2-3 more chapters until this finally ends  
> (I made a fanart, you'll see at the end of the chapter)

I woke up with no one beside me. I touched the space where Daniel should be I it felt so cold-- _so cold._

 

Walking downstairs I see no one, the living room was messy unlike any other days, and there was no breakfast on the dining table. It felt odd and terrifying. I just felt like something terrible will happen.

 

But as stupid as I deemed I am, I tried to cover my anxiety with a good excuse that maybe he went somewhere for a while and will come back as the sweet Daniel that he was.

 

I forced myself to smile-- I picked up the pan and opened the stove.

 

Daniel will be back and.. and he will kiss me good morning..

 

 

 

_*Click*_

 

 

I could hear footsteps from behind me and I started to feel nervous. I couldn’t take it anymore so I turned my head and smiled as brightly as I can.

 

“Good morning, Daniel..”

 

But Daniel didn’t spare me a glance. Feeling upset, my hand unconsciously dropped and ending up burning my hand on the pan. I yelped in pain. My eyes searched for his but I saw nothing but dead eyes. He walked out of the kitchen after grabbing an alcohol. My heart started aching, It’s all going back to the way it was when I first met him.

 

I continued sobbing as I clutched my own hands.

 

All the butterflies he gives me every single second, all the kisses he stole from me, all the hugs he gives me from behind, all the chivalry of him carrying me to bed, all the times we cuddle each other when we had nothing to do, all the times he makes me smile and contented with everything I have now, is all gone- vanishing just like a bubble.

 

Just like that my heart was crushed into pieces, Daniel was no doubt slipping away from me. The Daniel I loved so much was slowly changing into the Daniel I feared so much. In span of just a short time, it felt so tragic how we easily turned out this way, of that just one mistake I regret so much of blurting out.

 

Sometimes I wish I would just shut up at a wrong time. I wish I could just turn back time.

 

Ever since the beginning, I thought that maybe Daniel and Euigeon hated each other. Euigeon wanted to get rid of Daniel as he stated before.

 

And that realization hit me so hard. How could I be so oblivious to their obvious intentions?

 

A lot of thoughts came into my mind.

 

  
One, Maybe the treatment was too harsh for the both of them yet Daniel survived due to his undying hatred and Euigeon's existence might be completely gone.

 

Two, They were trying to get rid of each other.

 

Three, Daniel thought I chose him over Euigeon when I love the both of them as much.

 

Four, He was angry because I mentioned Euigeon, and worse, I was looking for him.

 

And five, I'm so stupid.

 

Our relationship became worse when I found a sideline and tried to work for a living. Daniel was so furious with my decision, we fought over it, screaming and yelling at each other and that was the first time he beat me up. Of course, I love him so I didn't care about it that much. I went to work with bandages plastered all over me but I didn't care.

 

On the first day of my job, I received another beating after coming home. A co-worker named Minhyun politely gave me a ride home since it's my first day on the job. When I got out I talked a bit to Minhyun and thanked him for his kindness. My heart dropped when I turned to the door, Daniel's hand was gripping the door knob tightly and refusing to stop glaring at the fancy car until it was out of sight.

 

The next thing was his hand gripping my neck tightly. Throwing me curses and kicks until we were on the floor.

 

"What was that smile huh? Is the hand shake and ruffling of hair necessary, Park Jihoon?" He angrily spat at me. "Did you ever think about leaving and going to that asshole?"

_What?_

"No- Daniel--" I tried my best to remove his grip and give myself some air passage to speak. "I.. I--" I started crying at the way he was trying to kill me, I never wanted this to happen. I only wanted to live happy with both Euigeon and Daniel. "--I l-love you," loud sobs escaped my bruised lips and continue to cry loudly.

 

Loosening my grip on his arms in defeat, it's a surprise that he stopped strangling me. I opened my blurry eyes and saw that Daniel was growling in pain, pulling his hair and muttering 'no' and string of curses. I stay frozen, finally waiting for it to stop since Euigeon.. _Euigeon is coming back._

"E-Euigeon?" I softly whispered his name.

 

He breathes heavily for a few seconds before looking at me in the eyes.

 

"Ji.. Jihoonie,"

 

My heart swells in relief, missing the soft voice and features of Euigeon. Bawling my eyes out, not because of the pain Daniel has inflicted on me but because of the happiness I felt, just by knowing that he's finally here.

 

"Where am- What happened to you?" He noticed that he was sitting on top of me. He saw all the bruises and wounds Daniel got me. He saw the marks of his fingernails on my skin-- screaming an attempt of strangling me to death. It was his turn to tear up. "Did Daniel.. do this to you?" He was about to caress my cheeks but stopped as if I would disappear if he did.

 

My whole body ached for his gentle touch and so I aggressively put his palms on my cheeks. "I'm okay Euigeon," I smiled at him while leaning onto his palms. "I'm so happy that you're--"

 

"No, no Jihoon." He abruptly stood up and backed away from me. Leaving me lying on the floor. I sat up straight, confused by his actions. "I can't-- I- no, don't go anywhere near me,"

 

"What are you talking about?" I smiled at him even though it hurts me that he's avoiding me. "I'm fine Euigeon," I tried to stand up but the pain in my waist got the best of me, causing me to fall down again. "Oh, I lost my balance _haha_ ," I lied, tried to giggle cutely for him to make him believe that I’m okay.

 

Daniel dropped to the floor, cupping his eyes.

 

"I'm such a monster, I don't want to hurt you but--"

 

_No._

 

"-Fuck, you don't deserve this Jihoon, I love you,'

 

_Stop it._

 

"I don't deserve you, this world, I don't deserve anything," He was breathing heavily.

 

_Please--_

 

My tears just won't stop.

 

 _Where are you going?_   was what I wanted to say but my voice failed me.

 

Crestfallen, Daniel walked into a room.

 

_The kitchen._

_What is he going to do?_ I wondered, still on the floor. Then suddenly I heard a soft sound of a cabinet being opened. _What is he getting?_ I wondered, still. A sharp sound made me flinch, terrified of the thought forming in my head. I stood up and ran towards the kitchen.

 

I screamed when I saw Daniel holding a knife. I launched towards him and tackled him on the ground, knocking the knife off his hands. I punched him in the face at least a dozen times until I felt satisfied. I didn't even care at that moment that my hands were covered with his blood and his face having the same bruises as mine.

 

"You want to die? _You_ fucking want to die huh?" I grabbed his collar. "What about me? Listen Kang Euigeon, I fucking love you and Daniel so much. It pisses me that you even try to kill yourself but I.. I never thought of killing myself when I'm in pain because I want to be with you." I tightened my grip on his collar,

 

I was so angry. I can see his eyes wide and shaking. I know I've never shown him this side of me, because even I didn't know I could be in this horrible state. It just pains me to the guts. I can't live without Euigeon. His expressions softened and my hands loosened up.

 

" I.. I want to spend every moment of my life with you, no matter what, I will fix this, I will find a way, so please.." I breathed out, "Don't give up on us," I dropped myself on his chest and cried all night. By the motion of his chest, I was definitely sure he was crying with me.

 

Several minutes have passed with us crying and holding on to each other. This night was definitely exhausting emotionally and physically.

 

"You love me.. don't you?" I asked in a hushed voice even though I already knew the answer. It's just that my heart yearns for a verbal confirmation that I can't seem to avoid.

 

"More than anything."

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 


End file.
